Momfinitions

So I decided to enter this Momfinitions contest. Leave me a comment cause I get points for that, too! Thanks and enjoy.

Elastibreast (ee-las-tea-breast) n. – What your breast turns into after more than one pregnancy. Elastibreast, also known as elastiboob, is a condition accompanied by the ability to breastfeed a child in your lap without using your hands or arms for any type of support.

Poopdar (poop-dar) n.- Similar to the fartdar, the poopdar is the ability to determine when someone has dropped a load into their diaper.

The sensitivity of ones poopdar increases during pregnancy and is not always considered a blessing. The poopdar does not seem to be as effective in men, though, and this subject is extremely taboo in some households.

Binkinese (Bean-kee-knees) n. – The strange, almost English sounding language that comes from the mouth of of a pacified child. We call them “binkies” in our house. Some call them “pacies” so this momfinition may also be known as Pacinese (Passy-knees).

Snotcolate (snot-co-lit) n. – What evolves when a child who is scarfing down chocolate doesn’t take the time to breathe or let you wipe their runny nose.

Whinese (whine-ease) n. – Similar to Binkinese, this
strange language evolves when a child proceeds to whine in place of using actual words. All words become one long sound such as “MaaaaahhhhmeeeeIdooooon’twaaaaanttoooooooo,” producing Whinese.

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About Mamamojo

My name is T. I am a homeschooling, home/water birthing, dreadlocked, special needs mama to four beautiful daughters. I'm married to my best friend. I am a natural childbirth and breastfeeding advocate. I have done some volunteer work as a peer counselor with WIC and as a doula with Birthwell Partners and plan to be a midwifery assistant one day. My blog was created to put some alternative information out there about breastfeeding, childbirth & other issues regarding motherhood and life in general. I hope that you enjoy reading here and visit me often. Thanks for reading!
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71 Responses to Momfinitions

  1. Christi says:

    ROFLMAO!!! Those are great!

  2. Pingback: Help a Mama out y'all!! - AmityMama.com

  3. Lisa says:

    Too funny. I think I can understand all those languages, LOL!

  4. crystal says:

    i love it

  5. Missy says:

    That’s hilarious!

  6. Jessica F says:

    funny!

  7. Marinda says:

    Those are too funny. 🙂

  8. Erin says:

    These are great!

  9. eyesoftheworld says:

    lol! love it!

  10. Desiree says:

    LOVE THESE!!!! SOO FUNNY!

  11. Stephanie says:

    Hah! I love it, Tara! Perfect.

  12. Dawn says:

    This are great! I love it.

  13. Cynthia says:

    Great! We speak all of those languages at my house.

  14. melissa says:

    cracking up. these are great.

  15. soaringeagle says:

    you forgot underbra which goes along with the elastiboob
    its when your underwear doubles as a bra because your boobs are tucked into your pants

  16. Kate says:

    Funny Stuff!

  17. Helen says:

    I did not you where watching my house. 😉

  18. Catherine says:

    Elastabreast is my fave! How ’bout when you can feed your babe in the back seat while driving with your elastabreast?

  19. Jodie says:

    Sign me up for two Whinese!!!! I can’t take it. lol 🙂

  20. Kristen says:

    This is awesome hahaha!!!! I hope you win!!!

  21. Gracie says:

    Love them!!

  22. Rocheal says:

    LMAO You crack me UP!!!!!!!! Those are greatttt

  23. kristen says:

    Very funny 🙂

  24. jasonVII says:

    lolz, very funny

  25. Lianna says:

    Good ones! Hilarious!

  26. 11milkteeth says:

    tehe, funny mama^___^

    xxx

  27. Rebecca says:

    I love the elastiboob!!!! I definitely have those 🙂

  28. ashley says:

    you so funny! lol.

  29. Brooke says:

    Love these!!! 🙂

  30. des says:

    GREAT MOMFINITIONS….i am fluent in whinese!!!

  31. Jenn S says:

    These are great!

  32. Miranda says:

    adorable! and oh so true…

  33. Stacey says:

    Love these, very funny!

  34. Emily says:

    Cute!! So sadly true…

  35. Carleen says:

    HA! These are too funny!

  36. Rebecca says:

    hahahah! That is so funny! I love the elastiboon especially!

  37. Carrie Small says:

    Love these! The elastiboob has effected me…and I only have one 😉

  38. Tara says:

    Funny stuff right there, I am familiar with them all!!

  39. Jody says:

    ha!! love it!

  40. Irina says:

    So true 😀

  41. Natalie says:

    I so could have lived without ever reading snotcolate!
    The first one I can totally identify with.

  42. Margie says:

    Cute!

  43. Stephanie says:

    Just goes to show you Mommyhood really is universal, lol. Love these!

  44. sallyrich says:

    Laughing still!! How true, how true!! 😉

  45. Stephanie says:

    hahaha. These are hilarious!

  46. Carmen says:

    LOL – I think every mom can relate!

  47. These are hilarious! ROFL!

  48. Munki says:

    😀 Great stuff haha. I liked the Snotcolate one. yummy!

  49. Regina Brigham says:

    Love it. Soo very true, all of them!

  50. Sheila says:

    You were always good with words. ROFL!. These are unique.

  51. copmom says:

    Modern English will never be the same!

  52. Jenny says:

    Good ones! Snotcolate seems to be a delicacy in our home…

  53. Jennifer says:

    I love it!

  54. Karen says:

    Hilarious and *so* true!!

  55. viri says:

    Haha. You are a funny mama 😀

  56. Sharon says:

    Too cool!! Hope you win… You look great.

  57. Gerard says:

    hilarious!!!

  58. layla says:

    Hillarious!!! I recognized all the terminology:)

  59. Lydia says:

    Too cute! Very creative!

  60. Erika Leigh says:

    This is pricessless!! I totally love this!

  61. teri says:

    Excellent!!

  62. Stephanie Knight says:

    I am laughing out loud!! These are too funny! I don’t think I can pick a favorite…I love them alllll!!

  63. DeAnn says:

    Too funny!

  64. Mandy says:

    Cute. Oh the joys of momhood! Its great that all moms can relate to this!

  65. Babyhellfire says:

    LOL.. I got one
    “Booty call-[BOO-tee kawl] noun: A shout from the bathroom letting you know it’s time to go wipe someone’s butt. “

  66. These are HILARIOUS! Thanks for the good laugh!

  67. william says:

    these are great what contest?

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